The Wing Effect: How Change Management Coaching Boomerangs Generosity Into Returns
In change management coaching, one of the most grounding truths I return to again and again—both as a practitioner and as a human—is this: what we give, returns. Many of my clients ask, aren’t things just random? Aren’t we all just winging it. Every single one of us. Leadership, growth, healing, relationships—none of it comes with a perfect manual. And yet, somehow, we’re also deeply interconnected. In Transformational leadership, the real work isn’t about control or certainty; it’s about awareness, alignment, and understanding how our actions ripple far beyond what we can see. Mostly, it is about the willingness to go first, to release the boomerang with Faith that it will return. NOT FEAR, Faith that it will return. NOT WHEN will it return, just Faith that it will come back.
There’s a phrase I love: givers gain. And if we’re being honest, many of us quietly wonder, If that’s true, why am I not getting what I want? The answer can be uncomfortable—and freeing at the same time. We don’t attract what we want. We attract what we are. If we are operating from scarcity, urgency, or expectation, that’s often what comes back. When we surrender all the rules and give—freely, without strings, without performance—we create space for life to respond in kind. Like a boomerang, or in my case like a wing. Ironically they look pretty similar… lol
Let me tell you my Super Bowl Sunday story. Yes… it’s about wings. And no, it’s not really about wings at all. Here it is…
I had ordered chicken wings on an online delivery app for Super Bowl Sunday—simple enough. When they arrived, though, they were completely wrong. Not the smaller drumsticks my wife wanted to prepare, but full wings – boomerang looking things—the kind that look like they came straight off the bird. (I’m sure there’s a proper culinary term here, but trust me: they were not what we planned.)
The next morning, I brought them back to the store they were ordered from, hoping to return them. I was told they “don’t accept returns” from 3rd party delivery services. So there I was—standing in the store with a big, cold package of wings I didn’t want, days before the big game. I wasn’t going to cook them, and wasn’t going to drive back home with them to store for another day I would not cook them all because I was stuck with them.
And then something clicked.
I walked over to the wing section and noticed a couple searching through the refrig, clearly looking for wings for their own Super Bowl plans. I went out on a limb and approached them “Are you looking for wings?” Laughing to myself gently and asked if they’d like mine. I explained they had just come out of my refrigerator, were still cold, sealed in a bag, and—most importantly—free.
Their reaction was pure joy after they processed I was not a lunatic and was not asking them for something. I was there to give, without any ask. Then after the standoff “keep out of my 3’ and no I do not want any of your girl scout cookies speak was ready” Their faces lightened and I felt their Gratitude. Disbelief. They kept asking, “Are you sure?” I can’t give you something for all of this. I smiled and said its for you. And that was that.
Later, my mom asked me why I didn’t just push harder for the return. Ask for a supervisor she said. My answer surprised even me: Because I was supposed to give them to those people. Maybe they needed the food. Maybe they needed the kindness or even more importantly, they needed to feel the feeling of receiving without attachment. Maybe they just needed a reminder that strangers can show up for each other. We never really know—that we don’t need to know each other to give and to receive.
That same day, I stopped by another store – Earth Origins Supermarket in St. Petersburg Florida Florida to pick up some vitamins, soup and a few of their organic items. On a whim, I looked to see if they sold wings even though I expected to have to go to another chain or big box to get what I was looking for. I headed over to the freezer and then the refrigerator and I didn’t see any. Immediately someone said “can I help you find something” The deli manager, Maggie was called over. She told me they could order anything for me if I called ahead of time—and then added, “Let me check the back. We might have wings we cook fresh here.” Knowing how amazing their Organic wings are, I said ok.
She returned with wings. Beautiful, organic wings. She packaged them carefully and offered them at a special price—lower than usual… just for me. I was so grateful. At checkout, the cashier was kind, asking how we were doing. We had a brief and meaningful exchange on how we are all connected and kindness matters… She then paused, looked at the order, and said, “No charge for these—Mike, the Manager said not to charge you for the wings. These are on him.”
Just like that.
I walked out with 36 organic wings—packaged with care, specially prepared, and given freely without expectation. I actually stopped in my tracks, went back in and asked for Mike specifically. I asked why he did that, he simply said, “I had a feeling” or something similar to that. I told him that earlier that very morning, I had given wings away to strangers because of my feeling and it just felt like the right thing to do. We both just smiled.
That moment felt like a boomerang return.
In Transformational leadership, we talk about alignment—how values become action, and action becomes culture. In change management coaching, we explore how small shifts create massive change. This wasn’t a grand gesture. It was food. It was timing. It was presence. And for my hesitating clients who ask for proof and want tangible results. It was also proof: generosity doesn’t disappear. It circulates.
If you’ve ever wondered whether your kindness matters, whether your effort is seen, whether giving without guarantees is worth it—this is your reminder. Be the light, yes. Also trust that the light knows where to go and when to return in kind.
Because in the end, we really are all just winging it, we are aligned, connected and what we put out returns- sometimes quickly and sometimes over time. In change management coaching, that’s not a flaw—it’s the invitation. Will you go first? Will you do it anyway, even if you do not have tangible results NOW. Will you stay the course? When we lead with Transformational leadership, generosity, and non judgment, we don’t just change ourselves. We change the room. The moment. The outcome. It all boomerangs back. Sometimes we get smiles and sometimes… we get wings.
